Some people say that 'Almost' is the saddest word in the whole world. Today, I understand why. OSN was finally over, and so was the medalists announcement. Alhamdulillah, my school got 1 gold (earth science), 1 silver (biology), and 5 bronzes (geography, physics, IT, chemistry, and math <from a tenth grade student>) this year. Yup, there, the silver one, is mine. I got silver last year, and I got the same this year. Not bad, not at all. My rank moves upward too, from 11th to 6th. Yes, 6th, which means first silver. Just one step close to gold. I don't want people to think that I'm ungrateful. Because I'm grateful. I'm happy because it's really a good result. But I'm sad that I couldn't get something actually so close to reach. I feel like regretting something, but I do realize there's nothing to regret. So I'm really conflicted right now. I'm happy for all my friends who get the golds (I know all of them personally), but I'm sad because I wish I would be one of them.
But after all, it's fine. Not perfectly, but fine is still fine. I believe God knows best. And this, is the best for me. There are a lot awful of lessons I've learned today. How to accept that some things are not meant to be ours. How to understand that in the end, it is all depend on our faith. No matter how good or bad you were, today is a very different story. How to learn to be grateful, to look down when you feel bad, and look up when you feel proud. And after all, this is clearly NOT the end. I will join pelatnas (I guess and I hope), I will join the national examination and get to a new life. I still have a long way to go. I still have many chances ahead. I hope everyone, whoever he or she is, who is not satisfied with the result, will get over this, soon or later.
It's bad that I cried in my last year of national olympiad, but this has always been a fascinating experience for me. One of the few places I feel like belong to, and one where I could find cool friends (and even best friends) who have the same passion and dream with me.
At last, Thank you for the amazing ride for these last 6 years... :-)
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